🧀 Soul Snacks

9 min read

Dear Snackers,

Because of my social media following and history with paediatric cancer, I am frequently contacted by people who have friends or family members in similar situations. Emotionally it can take a toll on me, especially when it’s about kids - it never gets easier hearing about sick kids, and almost always makes me cry, but I am passionate about helping when and if I can. Most of us know someone who’s going through something pretty real - the untimely loss of a loved one, a difficult surgery, or a serious illness. People are so good, they all want to help, but aren’t always sure how. This is my list of the ten most helpful things you can do for someone going through hard times:

1. Don’t be afraid to ask – Often when we see someone for the first time since hearing of their crisis, we are unsure of what to say and can make the mistake of avoiding it all together, but it is always, always better to say something and ask how they are doing. Once you open the door to the conversation, if they offer detail feel free to ask more, but if they seem fragile, just leave it at that and let them know they have been on your mind. They will be grateful for the acknowledgement.

2. Bring Provisions – If you’re close to the person, take the reins and organize a Meal Train. If you’re more of a peripheral friend, see if you can get onto the Meal Train so you have a scheduled slot. If no one has organized a Meal Train for the family, drop something off they can eat now or throw in the freezer for another day. 

3. Make offers – Don’t ask people in crisis what you can do to help them; offer specifics. If they have kids and you’re taking your kids to the playground, shoot them a message to let them know you can take their kids, too. People need some time alone to grieve or cry or to just be. They can always say no, but tangible offers are great because often people don’t really know what they even need. 

4. Check in – Text messages are a beautiful thing. If someone you know is going through a difficult time, your intermittent thoughts might be more helpful than you realize. Feeling support is a great reminder that you’re not alone, as well as a distraction from the situation. When my son was diagnosed we were so flooded with messages of support, it helped ease the sadness. I am still so grateful for the people who would continually check in on us. 

5. Think practical – If someone you know gets cancer, for example, chances are they’re receiving hats and blankets up the wazoo, and they will have to wash and store all these items. Try to think of things that won’t inundate them or their storage capacity in any way. If the family is under financial stress and you feel uncomfortable sending cash, gift certificates are a good idea, too.

6. Don’t feel the need to send a gift – A handwritten note or card can have the same effect.

7. Invest – If you are really close to a person going through a difficult life event, do your best to educate yourself about whatever they are going through (i.e. the details of a procedure, treatment regimens, or logistics of caretaking). If you have some understanding of the lingo, it will make it easier for that friend to talk to you.

8. Send help – The last thing anyone in crisis wants to deal with is cleaning the toilets or doing the laundry. Band together with some friends and send a cleaning service to their house.

9. Be positive – Your vibes are powerful. Reassure your friends that easier times are ahead. If people can feel your confidence that things will be OK in the end, they will feed off that; the power of positive energy is boundless.

10. When all else fails, send wine. 

— Caitlin

• DRINK: I drink a Cure packet every single day, legit. My favorite flavor is fruit punch, but my other favorites are lemon, watermelon, strawberry kiwi and peach tea. You kinda can't go wrong with any of their flavors. Use my code BTA20 to get 20% OFF.

• MAKE: I LOVE COTTAGE CHEESE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!!! I love it for its saltiness and I love it for its creaminess and I love it for its insanely high protein content. I figured I would share this list of recipes that use cottage cheese I just came across in case you love it like I love it.

• LISTEN: No playlist this week because I’d like to take a moment to announce my referral program: Refer 1 friend and get my Secret Playlist; refer 10 friends and get a Cure Starter Kit (value of $19 USD)! Your referrals are automatically tracked so simply forward this email to your buds. Thank you for sharing!